Today I helped a friend de-clutter. Accompanying the actions, was streaming dialogue along the lines of “I don’t need this anymore” or “I can’t think of the last time I wore this”. Simple statements, which produced results, stuff got thrown out, recycled or donated. Space was created, and we both felt better.
So what’s the big deal? That’s a good thing, right?
What occurred to me was that these positive results were achieved through negative statements, therefore thoughts and emotions … and I realised that we do it constantly, everyday, in every way.
For example, “I go to the gym to lose weight” “I want a partner who doesn’t this and doesn’t that” “a job that doesn’t involve …” “a house that doesn’t have …” We are awesome at pointing out the bad, and the ugly, and think that we are making good choices, protecting ourselves, standing up for ourselves, and achieving positive results.
Knowing where we are is imperative to moving forward, but as important is to ask “how did I get here?”. An action precipitated by don’t, can’t, mustn’t, shouldn’t, surely comes out neutral. We bank the negativity of the journey and then the positive result, and the sum is nothing. So is it a positive result at all?
I started going to the gym to reduce physical pain. To treat a condition I have by exercise and stretching. Earlier this year, a very wonderful friend of mine pointed out that this reasoning is rather negative, and therefore my results cannot be positive. Sure, the action decreases the pain, but the power of the thought patterns interfere with the whole package. My inner self is still suffering, because my focus is negative and based on fear. I was doing a good action – for the wrong reason. I also made certain choices about my diet for the same reasons – my health. Again, I attached not eating certain foods as a means to avoid pain and suffering. All this does is remind me that I can suffer, it focuses on the fear of suffering, and therefore it increases as does the power of the negative habitual thinking.
So, this year I have been training myself to focus on love and respect for my body, regardless of what is ‘wrong’ with it. To exercise and eat well because I am my biggest fan. Because I want vitality, good feeling, energy and fun. The focus is health, not illness. The reason is joy, not fear. The end results include being in less pain, but I am no longer focused on these, I am loving being free to move around and enjoy life, to walk and work out. The experience of being at one with my physical body is the journey and the source of the action is self respect and love. It creates a whole new outlook, and the best thing is, my insides are happy and healthy too.